asgardchrysalis

Who: Mary Crawley and John Grey
What: After various revelations, Mary and John need to have a talk
When: Early April
Where: The farmhouse
Rating: PG-13, probably some discussion of sex and sexual orientation

After the mission with the half-orcs and Jim's return and admission that had he died (again), Mary's been feeling a bit down. Not only was the mission a disaster in her eyes, Jim had chosen to go through the pain of death yet again, something that made her ache for him. The subsequent revelation that he had slept with John earlier before their relationship had begun has left her with a lot to process. She isn't really mad, just confused and uncomfortable about the whole thing. Jim assures her that she is the one he wants to be with, but she can't help but question that in the light of this information.

Mostly, she needs to speak with John in order to try to understand everything - and how she could have possibly gotten it so wrong. Mary leaves a note for him on his door inviting him to tea later that day. She knows that Jim has spoken with him already, and she hopes that he shows up and isn't trying to avoid her at all. Mary likes John a great deal and simply wants to sort things out.

The tea and some biscuits are prepped when she hears the knock at the door. Mary opens it and smiles to find John on the other side. "Please do come in."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

He wouldn't say that it's particularly reassuring to know, but at the same time John does feel more at ease, that Mary does at least understand where he's coming from. That the way of life he has known, for better or worse, the laws he has lived by and under, that they were not thus overturned in a day, as though they had not mattered in the first.

He sits politely listening to Mary's story of her Mr Barrow, unable to help the feeling that he would have liked to have had a friend like Mary, back in his own time.

"I appreciate you saying so," he says, offering her a soft smile in return, before glancing back down at the tea in his hands. "In a perfect world, would that everyone considered these things the same way as you do, my dear. It is not a particularly comfortable feeling, to live with the fear that those you care about might shun you so for something that, as far as I am concerned, you have very little control over."

She exhales a small laugh. Mary actually knows how he feels being worried about being shunned.

"This place is much different from either of our homes," Mary says. "I rather think you could be very open with another man and it would not be frowned upon." Picking up her teacup again, she takes a sip. "There's something else I must ask though. Do you... have feelings for Jim?"

Mary's not sure if she wants to hear the answer, but she really needs to know. Jim seemed to think that John wasn't interested in him like that, but Mary's not so sure.

John glances up at Mary at the question, watching her carefully. He has to give her credit for coming straight out and asking him plainly, in as direct a manner as she has. But he also has to wonder himself whether she really does want to know the answer, either way.

"I have never had much luck in love, you see," he says, after a long moment. Taking in a long breath and letting it out slowly, playing his long, delicate fingers against his teacup before he continues on to ask, "You have been here in Asgard for some time now, have you not? Did you ever have the pleasure of making the acquaintance of a Mr. James Fraser, perchance? Or Claire, maybe? His wife. She may have been going by the name of Randall, to begin."

It's a long story, and not even he knows the half of it.

That's not an answer, but she'll play along for now and hope that he's going to long way around to get there.

"Yes, I did meet Mr. Fraser," Mary replies. "Scotsman, right? I never met his wife though. Did you know them back home?"

He's asked the question to several other Travelers, to little effect, and so it is that he is somewhat taken aback at the fact that Mary does know of Jamie. His surprise showing unguarded on his face for a moment before he puts himself back in check.

"As a matter of fact, I did," he replies, flashing her a soft smile. "Mr Fraser and I are long-acquainted now, through one means or another. We had formed -- a particular sort of friendship between us, you see. To put it simply, Jamie was my prisoner. And being his Warden, I held a certain responsibility over those men within the walls of Ardsmuir. But the men saw him as a sort of leader you might say. So in the effort to make peace with my prisoners, for I was not their enemy, and I wanted them to understand that, Jamie and I..."

He shrugs slightly, before continuing, "We passed a fair amount of evenings together. Getting to know each other. He is... A very handsome man, of course. But very kind and just. He would sacrifice everything he had for his men, and I -- admired that in him. I do."

He flashes his eyes back up to Mary, gauging her reaction as he says, "I fell in love with him. Much to my chagrin. And much to his disgust, it's unfortunate to say. I never meant to make anything of it, but one slip almost cost us everything we had. It was nearly five years again before he trusted me again. So you see..."

He sits forward in his seat, steeping his fingers on the table before himself. "Whether I have feelings for Jim or not is irrelevant. The two of you have each other, and I am happy for you. And I would be happy to remain in your friendship. The pair of you. That is, if you are both amenable."

Mary concurs about Jamie being a handsome man. It had been quite striking to see him walking around in a kilt, looking better than any of her Scottish relatives ever had. Imagine her disappointment when the first thing he'd mentioned was a wife.

Her eyebrow raises as John tells his story, Mary expecting it to go one way, and then slowly frowns as it goes another. "I'm sorry," she says. "I don't expect that it is easy for men of your persuasion." The fact that having sex with a man is criminal in his time is only part of his worries.

She places her teacup back on its saucer. "Both of us wish to continue being friends with you, John," she continues. "We enjoy your company."

Mary doesn't think his feelings for Jim are irrelevant though. Knowing that there is the possibility that John and Jim might eventually decide they're better off without her will still gnaw at the back of her mind.

John doesn't suppose that she does, for that matter. Or else she would not have asked. It puts him, all of them to some degree, in rather an awkward position.

"I am glad to hear it," he replies, reaching to take a sip of his tea, as much to give his hands something to do as anything. "Your friendship, both of yours, it does mean a great deal to me here. Yours in particular my dear, for you and I, we are -- of an understanding, shall I say."

He raises his teacup to her and flashes the briefest of smiles. A very proper British salute, before he sets his cup down once more. Keeping his eyes fixed on it for a moment longer before he continues on, doggedly.

"Yet now that I have thus bared myself to you, I would ask your honesty in return."

He fixes her a markedly direct eye. "Knowing all that I have told you, do you enjoy my company still?"

"We are," she agrees, raising her own tea cup in response. Mary is still sipping from it when he asks for her honesty.

"Yes. I do," she says. "Honestly, it's rather trivial whom you wish to love or sleep with. Frankly, it isn't my business." It means a bit more to her because they happen to be sharing a man in this instance, but in general she doesn't have an issue.

John raises his eyebrows in response to her words. No one from his time would think in such a way, certainly not if he were to be sleeping with another man, and certainly not if he were to have slept with their lover, past tense or not. But he appreciates that Mary seems to be taking it all in stride. He was being honest himself in that as far as he is concerned, no matter what his feelings for Jim are concerned, he is with Mary, and that is what matters now.

"Well," he says, flashing her another, softer smile. "I am glad to hear it."

His eyes dropping to the teacup in his hand as he continues, "James Kirk is a good man. He was worried for your loneliness, should the fact that he had shared such a thing turn me from our friendship, but the truth of the matter is that the pair of you, your friendship, has been everything to me, in this place. I would wish for you to know that, if nothing else."

She's taking it in stride and taking Jim at his word that she is the one he wants to be with. If things change, her laissez-faire attitude might as well. But, she has to at least try to trust both of them. Mary likes both of them very much and does not want to lose her friendship with either of them.

"That's very sweet of him," she says with a small smile. "It's been my great pleasure to know you as well, John. You are probably the one person here who most understands what it is like to be from my time and place."

They might be separated by nearly 200 years, but a lot of things had remained the same.

A Talk

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject