asgardchrysalis | ( open ) you cut me deep

Entry tags:

( open ) you cut me deep

Who: James T. Kirk & you!
What: Finding out about his blood magic spell (blood telepathy) + Odin's compulsive honesty curse
When: Early/mid April
Where: Around
Rating: PG? Just a bit of blood but not expecting anything more.

I ▹ BLOOD MAGIC

Jim should have figured they wouldn't come back from that cave entirely unaffected. The last time he died he ended up with a soreness in his shoulder and down his side that has never quite vanished, sometimes even prickling and feeling a little numb, so when he actually can't sense anything different in him for days after they come back, it starts to feel like something is just strange or off.

It starts with vague dreams, at first; he can hear droplets fall, something dripping, dripping... it's not until the third night that he notices that the droplets are dark red, thick, pooling on the ground, spattering around. Then he begins to hear voices. Unintelligible words, and it's his voice reaching out, calling, the whispers and the sound of the falling blood drops growing louder and louder, almost deafening, until everything goes still and quiet and all he can hear is his own voice:

Listen to me.

He doesn't know what compels him to try this in the morning, but he does: he goes out to the field at the farm, and he takes out a sharp knife and nicks himself on the finger with it. There's a prickle of pain and he hisses, but instead of focusing on that, he closes his eyes and thinks of a specific person, someone he knows, and reaches out with his mind.

The message is short. A test, just to see if it really does what he thinks it should or not. Somewhere in the city, someone should be getting Jim's voice ringing in their head...

This is Jim Kirk. I'm at the farmland in Sigyn's district. If you can hear this message, please come meet me here.

II ▹ COMPELLED TRUTHS

Like many others, Jim doesn't escape Odin's curse. He's not a secretive person by nature, however, nor does he tend to lie, so he doesn't worry much that he might say something he doesn't want to. However, depending on what hour of the day someone runs into him, he may be feeling less or more frustrated with the curse that compels him to speak the truth, even when unasked or unprompted.

On the other hand, he might instead run into someone else who's affected. He won't use that to his own personal gain, though he might tease just a bit if he's comfortable with the person... But he won't be mean, really.

((ooc: for this prompt, basically feel free to write up your own starter as you think might best suit the compelled truth curse! I'm open to anything at all.))

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The hug is slightly surprising, but definitely not unwelcome. Chizuru doesn't seem to resist in the slightest, anyway. She just allows herself to be pulled over, even slightly leaning into the hold until he pulls back.

She wants to say that it's okay, but on the other hand, she knows it's not okay. She isn't okay. And so her honesty doesn't allow her to say it, even though she doesn't want to make Jim worry about her.

"It was really tough." Still is, in fact. Even now she's away from her own world. Maybe especially now she's away from her own world, since-- "I.. tried to be that hope. I thought that at least I could still be there for Hijikata-san through it all. But now I've been stuck in this city for so long, and he's back home all by himself.. I'm so worried about him."

Honestly, he just doesn't want to see her suffering. he knows it's inevitable, and maybe it is for the best that she does let all that out, cry for a while, but he just wants her to know that she can lean on him when she needs the support.

"I imagine it must be," he says. He doesn't need to come from a place at war to understand how devastating that can be. He pulls back a little more, meeting her gaze. "I'm sure he's missing you a lot. And I'm sure he's having a hard time, but... there's no point in letting the worry eat away at you. There's nothing any of us can do here for anyone who's been left back home."

"I wish there was," she says, but at the same time it means she does agree with his sentiment. Objectively speaking there really isn't a thing they can do. It's not even their fault that they're not present back home, considering they didn't exactly ask to be dragged off to another world.

But this is Chizuru. If there's anyone who's an expert at feeling guilty over things they technically can't help, it's her.

She smiles, but it's a very sad smile.

"Then I wouldn't have to feel so bad. Like I abandoned him."

He can't say he doesn't understand that. Jim feels just as guilty that he's not back home, helping where he can, together with his crew and friends. And he didn't even come from a time of war and conflict.

"You haven't. I'm sure he knows that. I'm sure he will know when you go back," he reassures her. And she knows he means it because... well, he can't even lie. "But I get it. I get feeling guilty over that, because I feel guilty too. It... sucks," he huffs a small chuckle. "Not easy to deal with that, is it? but we'll do our best. And we can help each other through the tougher days."

She's not too surprised to hear he feels guilty too. He seems like a responsible kind of person, after all, and there's got to be a lot back home that's depending on him. At least Chizuru's absence is mostly going to hurt one person - she can't even imagine how many people would be shocked or hurt by Jim suddenly being gone.

But she's grateful to hear what he's saying end on a hopeful note. It makes some of the sadness fade from her smile.

"You're right. Even if I wish I was home, I'm still glad for the people I got to meet here." Even under these strange circumstances. "You're such a kind man.. I really feel honoured to know you."

That too is something she means from the bottom of her heart, since she can't lie either. But the smile on her face already says enough about how genuine the sentiment is.

He smiles as he pulls away from the embrace, brushing her hair behind her ears a bit. He leans in to kiss her forehead lightly, hands resting on her shoulders.

"You're just as kind," he assures her. Maybe even more so. But that's not something they need to measure, is it? "I'm glad to have met you here, Chizuru. I hope you know that-- and that you can come to me if you ever need anything. Even if it's just to talk."

A light blush appears on her cheeks at the gesture, immediately followed by a happy smile. If anything confirms that meeting him was a good thing, it's this.

"I know that." Both of those things. Chizuru may be incredibly bad at actually talking about her problems, but it's absolutely not a lie that she knows he would listen to her if she tried. He's just kind like that. "And it means a lot to me. It makes me feel less alone here, even though there's no one I know from home."

Jim lets out a soft laugh at those words, tilting his head. "You must've read my mind. I feel exactly the same, and I know just how hard it is not having someone from home with you."

He does have a lot of people he's close to, people he cares about a great deal, but... it's difficult to explain. A part of him always feels a little alone, not having someone who comes from the same place he does, someone who understands everything about his life. As it is, it feels more and more like the very concept of home slips through his fingers like water.

"I guess most of us are kind of in the same boat."

But thankfully she doesn't sound too sad as she says that. Of course she misses home. She misses the people there, she misses being in a time period appropriate to her, she misses so many Japanese things that just totally aren't present in this place. She feels like she'll keep missing them, no matter how long she's here.

But at least there's kind people. Like him. And at least they all understand how tough it is, so far away from home.

".. Although this place must be even stranger to you, compared to home." At least living in a city that's not literally out in space is pretty normal for Chizuru, no matter how different said city might be.

Jim chuckles a little at her last comment, tilting his head. "It is, yes. This place is very lacking in technology, when compared to what I'm used to. Although it is much better now, but still very far from what I had back in my world. Plus, there's the whole magic thing. Never dealt with anything like it."

Extraordinary phenomena and people with unique abilities, sure, but that all could be explained through science, in one way or another. The laws here are just... different.

"But I've adapted. We all do, people are extraordinary like that. and who knows, maybe one day I can get my hands on some kind of ship and fly somewhere." Now, that would be great.

Chizuru is definitely nodding along when he starts about the magic thing. Although the technology to her is maybe actually even just a tad from beyond her time, it's not enough to bother her.. but the magic part? Now that's totally new to her as well.

But more importantly than that.. she smiles at the last part. It'd be nice for him to be able to do that much, right? But..

"As long as you don't stay away forever. I'd miss you."

He's smiling still, but it loses some edge there, a little sadder at her words. His hand still rests comfortingly on her back, though he glances down briefly before meeting her eyes again.

"Honestly... I don't know what I'd do, if I had the chance to go back to my world for good. Mostly because of some of the people I'd leave behind."

Maybe he wouldn't get to choose at all. He's not sure if that would be better or worse, just going to sleep one day and never waking up here again. Just finding himself home as though nothing had happened.

She grows quiet for a moment before softly speaking up again.

"Well.. If you want to stay here for a while longer even once they find a way for all of us to go home, I'm sure no one would mind." The gods have been relatively nice and welcoming to them so far, after all. "I kind of understand how you feel.. Although I would go home for sure if I had the choice."

She looks a little guilty as she says it. After all, only a moment ago Chizuru was saying she'd miss him. And she would! She would miss plenty of people here, but..

"After all.. No matter what, I can't abandon Hijikata-san more than I already have."

"Maybe," he lets out a sigh, deflating a little. "But we just don't know what might happen. What if there's a short window of time, and I have no time to linger on that decision?"

He smiles a little sadly. Although he knows it's not her intention, the way she puts it makes him feel even guiltier for his uncertainty about leaving. After all, wouldn't he be abandoning his own friends and crew by lingering here?

"Guess there's no point in worrying about that for now anyway, is there? Not until there really is a way out of here."

"I'm really bad at not worrying, even when it won't help matters much."

That's most definitely the honesty curse talking. There are a lot of things she said just now that she wouldn't have minded admitting to Jim in the slightest, but this one is much more of a border case. It rolls off her tongue easily now, even giving him a slightly shy smile, but she'll definitely freak out about it later.

(Honestly, it's not even that big or bad of a thing to admit to, but Chizuru would feel guilty regardless for bothering someone with her personal flaws.)

"But I'll try. Even though I feel kind of bad about my stay here, I want to make sure to enjoy the better parts of it while I still can."

Jim lets out a soft laugh at that, squeezing her shoulder lightly. "Yes, I had that feeling already," he says with a small smile. He's good at figuring people out most time, and he got that vibe from Chizuru even long before any honesty curse came along.

"Good," he nods, smiling. "It's not always easy. I know, believe me. But you know if you ever need to talk, I'm around to listen."

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( open ) you cut me deep

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