INTRO LOG + SKADI CURSE.

[asgardmods]

FEBRUARY INTRO LOG( FEB 16TH & 17TH ) february 16 ↴ INTRO: NEW WANDERERS' ARRIVAL! Our batch of new Wanderers wake this morning, as all new Wanderers have before, on a plush bed with a mild but lingering sense of recent disorientation. Frigg greets them as per normal, though rather than outright escorting Wanderers to the front doors this time, she and Sigyn allow the Wanderers time and space to leave their bed, meet the pantheon, and even depart the palace at their own pace - but not without a warning. All Wanderers must choose a deity to tether to before dawn the next day, or else one of the gods will choose them. This is of grave importance, as that's precisely how long the magic giving them form is able to last untethered before the Mother's own magic overwhelms it. (Though the gods are more than willing to allow Wanderers to leave, it's worth noting that many a castle servant - natives, born in this land - might see fit to intercede and insist on the choosing of a god before Wanderers step off the Gladsheim Palace grounds.) Stepping outside, you're greeted by an almost bright and sunny day... Undermined thoroughly by a sharp, biting wind that permeates any small gap in your clothing. I bet the gods might give you a sweater, if you ask. It probably won't even look that absurd, depending on which one you ask. A trail of what seems like stringless balloons float at eye level from just outside the palace door, guiding Wanderers down the path to a notice board just outside the palace grounds. On this notice board, Wanderers find a brief handwritten guide to accessing the city map on their cuffs, specifically denoting the little colored house icons ( ⌂ ) to help Wanderers make their way to each god's housing. Also on this board appear to be a variety of job listings, for those who want to get more involved in Asgard as a whole. But let's not get ahead of ourselves, shall we? There's more than enough time for that once you've chosen a god to tether to in the first place. february 17 ↴ GOD CURSE: CHARACTER-BUILDING WITH SKADI. The storm brewing within Skadi is hardly a secret. She was impatient during the gods' supposedly unanimous address, and in the days to follow, Sigyn (with all her desperately good intentions) tried to balm the irritation but only abraded the goddess further still. She attended the Wanderers' arrival purely by the letter of her duty and swept back out the doors as soon as that duty released her, and since then she's been holed up in her temple, her pointy-faced statues positioned just outside as sentinels meant to intimidate mortals away. They dared to tell her that she does nothing. Nothing for the Wanderers, that is. Nothing to help them grow and self-actualize, as if these 'Wanderers' are so much more important than Asgard itself, which weakens by the day as her fellow gods fling their magic about to overprotect the Wanderers, or even to satisfy their whims. The consensus to draw back some of that wasteful protection would have pleased her, if she weren't so thoroughly fixated on the slight that preceded it. They want her to help the Wanderers self-actualize? So be it. There's no better way, truly, than to confront and overcome the ways in which you're flawed. So the morning after arrival day, many Wanderers wake up with a stinging, itching spot somewhere on their body. Maybe their arm, maybe their back, maybe their throat. In that spot, as it turns out, is a set of words in a deep ruddy brown (almost like old blood) under their skin as if tattooed in place. But these aren't just any words - they prey directly into the Wanderer's fears, their regrets, their insecurities, and their mistakes. They're facing down some of the worst things they've ever thought or feared about themselves. The other gods, of course, are eager and willing to try to relieve the poor Wanderers of these cursed marks... but they find that it's not quite so easy. Wanderers who seek a god's removal of the words find that not only do the words remain, but a new set appears: Flees the truth. But that's fine = For most Wanderers, these words disappear on their own in a day or two. A handful of unlucky souls find that their marks linger indefinitely, or seem to disappear but return at truly inopportune occasions down the line. MOD NOTES This is the February intro log and Skadi's curse, our mini-event for this month! Skadi's curse is is entirely opt-in - not all Wanderers are affected - and is detailed more fully in the 'This Month's Events' section of the February Bulletin, and you're welcome to direct any follow-up questions to the Bulletin's mod questions top-level. You've also likely noticed that god jobs are now live! The listings themselves can be found here (same link as within the 'arrival' prompt), with a brief FAQ featured over here.

Comments

[lan_wangji]

"No," he murmurs, pressing closer as Wei Ying touches his own side. He puts his free hand over Wei Ying's, fingers gently caressing his knuckles as he puts his thoughts in order.

"Met Master Shen before seeing Master Ye. But the entire story is not known to me. Will not pass judgment, not as they did to you," he says, voice growing more fierce. "Told Master Ye I was grateful for his kindness to both of us. Master Shen is aware I know Master Ye and did not seem upset at the knowledge. Suspect it is very complicated."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian nods, drawing comfort from the warmth of Lan Zhan's hand resting over his. "I've been envious," he admits, "The relationship you have with your brother, the trust between you - it was always nice to see," he says, trying to reorder his thoughts through the sudden clamor.

"More unusual than it ought to be in this world."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan never quite knows how to balance his strong dislike of Wei Ying's brother with being respectful of Wei Ying's love for him.

His brings Wei Ying's knuckles up to kiss his hand once more, and tugs him towards their makeshift bed, still here for the random nights warm enough to spend in the house.

"Have been very fortunate to be blessed with Xichen-ge," he says, wishing he'd said so when he'd had the chance. He wishes he'd been able to call him such to his face, wishes so many things. "Wei Ying deserves the same. Come sit with me?"

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian nods, letting Lan Zhan draw him towards the bed. Yesterday he'd thought to try making them a proper bed. Now most of his thoughts lean towards keeping his robes on as long as possible.

"I'm glad you looked after Master Ye," he murmurs. There is more to learn, of course, but Master Ye has helped them time and again. "I've killed, too," he says, half to himself. "People dear to me are gone because of my choices. I can't hold this against him, horrible as it is."

[lan_wangji]

"Did not react as I should have three years ago, will not make the same mistake again," Lan Zhan insists, pulling Wei Ying down to sit and trying to immediately wrap him up in his arms as he's wanted to since he left Master Ye.

"Wei Ying is good. Wei Ying is the best man I know. Not because he is pure or energy is only light, because of all he is," he says, firmly kissing his temple. "Lan Zhan had to learn this lesson, but I do know it, now."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian winds his arms around Lan Zhan's waist, tucking his face in against the soft skin of his throat. "I love you for it," he admits. "Not only it, but - no one cares for me as you do. I wouldn't wish that fate on either of us, but if you were lost instead of me, I don't think I would bear it, Lan Zhan. I don't want to be alone again."

[lan_wangji]

"You won't be alone ever again," he whispers, fierce and determined as he holds Wei Ying close, closing his eyes. He can feel his breath, unsteady and warm against his throat and he would hold him like this forever if he were able. He will never fail this man again as long as he has breath in his body to do so.

"Only thing I have ever wanted for myself was you. And if this place ever takes you from me, you will go back to your Lan Zhan who loves you in the same way," he manages, throat aching at the thought of waking up someday without Wei Ying. The only comfort is he knows Wei Ying will be safe at home, knows any version of him will seek out Wei Ying and care for him.

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian wants to believe that. It's nearly impossible not to as fiercely as Lan Zhan is holding him, but at home, Lan Zhan let him go. It was Wei Wuxian's choice to leave, of course, he couldn't stay in the quiet Cloud Recesses forever, but Lan Zhan hadn't stopped him.

"You think he'll come for me?" he asks, rubbing absently at the words written over his heart. "He is Chief Cultivator, Lan Zhan. There is more to life than Wei Ying."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan thinks for a long moment, scratching up and down Wei Ying's back as he holds him. He thinks about thirteen more years of loneliness, of hoping. He tries to imagine this Lan Wangji, this Hanguang-Jun after enduring over a decade more of loss.

"I think he will come for you," he readily agrees as there is no world he can fathom where Wei Ying existed wholly apart from him. "I think he was afraid to trap you in Cloud Recesses. Think he wanted to give you freedom after everything you'd been through. Think he has also never believed you could love him in the same way. He would want you to find happiness and believes it could not be with him."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian huffs a breath against Lan Zhan's neck. "Well, I can't blame him for that one," he says. "I was a fool for a very long time. Saved by a mysterious enchanted sprig," he adds with a small smile, pulling back to look at Lan Zhan.

"One of your hands says Cold. What does the other say?"

[lan_wangji]

"Not enchanted," Lan Zhan huffs, as he feels they probably were saved by Lan Zhan's drunken impatience and Wei Ying's guileless and maddening statements.

He glances down at his other hand before looking at the spot on Wei Ying's chest where he'd seen him touch.

"Will tell you if you tell me what is under your robes. What did they do to you?"

[yiling_laozu]

This one, at least, cannot be argued with, and Wei Wuxian peels back his layers of robes to show Lan Zhan the damning words etched over his heart, their edges made even more gruesome by his branded scar.

Left him.

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan's expression darkens and he leans forward, kissing the vile, unwelcome word as if he could erase it through sheer will. This place, the magic here touched Wei Ying and he would rip it apart if such a thing were possible.

"Not your fault," he murmurs against Wei Ying's skin, feeling the rough edges of their matching brand. "Not Wei Ying's fault. What else did they write?"

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian inhales, wondering if Lan Zhan can feel him trembling against his lips. He really ought to have made up an excuse, somehow, he should have claimed Heimdall needed him and spent the day out of sight, but there's nothing for it now. He pushes his robes open further, showing him the words written over his left breast. Destroyed his family.

"Harder to deny, I think," he murmurs.

[lan_wangji]

"Wrong," Lan Zhan snaps, kissing twice over the words before pushing up to kiss Wei Ying's temple. "Wrong," he repeats, pressing his forehead to Wei Ying's.

"Wen Ruohan, Wen Chao, all of us who failed to protect the remaining Wen Sect. Not Wei Ying. Not Wei Ying's fault. You were only one who stood up for what was right. Made you a target."

[yiling_laozu]

"I made her one as well," says Wei Wuxian quietly into the narrow space between them. "Orphaned her child. But he is a good young man, despite his Uncles." This does comfort Wei Wuxian considerably, even if he wishes he could have had more time with his nephew.

He sighs, shrugging out of his robes entirely so he can twist, showing Lan Zhan the words that criss cross his back in a familiar pattern. Because of you they each read, every scrawled one of them angrier than the last. "I hate the reason for these the most."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan swears he can hear his heartbeat, breath ragged as he looks over Wei Ying's back. This is because of him. Lan Zhan is the cause of this and his precious, exquisite Wei Ying has taken even this on. It had been the reason he'd never wanted Wei Ying to know, aside from pure vanity of how terrible they look.

He pulls Wei Ying to him, covering his back with his chest as he presses his face to the back of Wei Ying's neck. "Not because of you," he manages, eyes filling as his chest shudders to take a steady breath. "Not because of you. Never Wei Ying's fault. I did this. I accepted my punishment. Would do it again."

[yiling_laozu]

"You were punished because you loved me," Wei Wuxian whispers, grateful to be facing away as a too hot tear spills down his cheek. "As were all the people I loved most. No one else remained alive to hold me in good memory, and they beat you for it, Lan Zhan."

[lan_wangji]

"Then blame them," he whispers fiercely as his own tears spill onto Wei Ying's neck. It isn't right. It isn't right after years of suffering, after losing his family, after killing himself right in front of Lan Zhan that Wei Ying should be made to suffer further.

"Blame the elders I beat. Blame Uncle. Blame me for waiting until after you died to make a stand. Not yourself."

He kisses along the soft, pale skin of Wei Ying's neck, heart beating frantically as he feels Wei Ying's breath hitch. "Proud of you. Proud you stood up for what is right."

[yiling_laozu]

"Until I didn't." He covers Lan Zhan's hands with his own, rubbing at his knuckles as he feels dampness bloom against his nape. "It isn't only that. I'm ashamed, Lan Zhan." He hadn't been before, but in the bliss of ignorance he hadn't known how much Lan Zhan cared for him, how much he would suffer if Wei Wuxian were not around.

"I didn't let you help me when you asked to. I didn't trust that the Wen clan would be safe if I left. And I thought - I thought I was making it better for all of you when I let myself fall. I always think I am so smart, but I get it wrong so often. Why am I like this?"

[lan_wangji]

He hugs Wei Ying more tightly, as if he could push his love through, wishing he could wrap Wei Ying up in it and make him feel how desperate he loves him.

"We were so young," he murmurs. "I had been self-righteous and stubborn, how could Wei Ying believe I would do the right thing rather than what the rules dictated? Wen clan would not have survived without you. I should have stayed, instead. Wei Ying is not wrong. It is hard to do the right thing as Wei Ying tried to do."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian shakes his head. He appreciates Lan Zhan's devotion, but if he had stayed, they both would have met the same end, but Lan Zhan's would have been even bloodier. "They would have turned on you, too," he says. "Hurt you even worse. If I had your blood on my hands, too, I would have already walked into the river."

[lan_wangji]

Lan Zhan moves around to face Wei Ying, hands immediately going up to wipe away Wei Ying's tears.

"I am so proud of you, Wei Ying. Am proud of who you are, every part of you. Am proud that you chose me to love," he says, hands sliding down to Wei Ying's shoulders, so pale and thin and vulnerable. "Not just love blinding me. I am proud of you. You are the best man I have ever known."

[yiling_laozu]

Wei Wuxian gives a wet laugh, but his eyes are warm when he looks at him, his dear, kind Lan Zhan. "And you are the best I've known." The best most people will know, Wei Wuxian expects, but even so, Lan Zhan does not know everything.

His irksome trembling returns as he steels himself, uncurling the fingers he'd spread automatically over his belly one by one. "There's one more," he says, voice catching until he makes himself breathe. "I'm afraid, Lan Zhan," he admits, pausing before the entirety of he hated you anyway can be seen. He wants a moment, just one moment more of Lan Zhan thinking the world of him. Even if he's not convinced he deserves it, it's a balm all the same. "You might think less of me."

[lan_wangji]

He wants to just say no, impossible, he can't but he doesn't think that is what Wei Ying needs to hear. There may be something that shocks him but nothing could make him love Wei Ying less so he simply nods and gestures towards Wei Ying's belly.

"I will never not want you, never not love you," he assures, vaguely grateful that this place stopped with two words for him, glad he can focus on Wei Ying.

"I know there are things you are keeping to yourself. The scar I've asked about. This, this thing. I am ready for all of it. Ready for all of you. Tell me."